Written & published by: Kevin Beard Jr.
The problem with physical violence today:
I just don't understand why now a days most teenagers, Men & Woman have to use "Physical violence" as an answer to solve an issue. Whether it's a relationship issue, or you or your friends got into a verbal argument, or physical argument, or you just don't like somebody in particular, & they don't like you back, or you're jealous of another person, or because your "hate" someone or because you have very bad anxiety, or simply because you're in a bad mood, or whatever the case may be.
Today, you see physical violence everywhere: in school's, colleges, stores, homes, apartments, & even in a work environment. Believe it or not, now a days, violence becomes a typical, but very common strategy used to solve issues. Can you honestly read this & tell me that you think 2 young girls or 2 young boys joining street gangs & hitting each other physically, with personal body parts by slapping each other, & kicking & knocking each other out with force, or pulling each others hair out, & throwing objects at each other, or putting each others hands up in the air, while having little "fiss fights" with each other & punching each other with all your power & knocking each other out to death, will solve anything in life? Do you think it makes them look "tough" & "bad ass?" Or just more "popular"? Because to me, it just makes them look like a foolish idiot, & that's possibly the lowest level of immaturity you can have. There are much more other ways you can use "self defensive" other then physically touching each other. When I see two of the same genders joining different street gangs & brutally fighting & knocking each other out to death, or choking each-other, I just wish those young teenagers could be caught in the act & sent to prison for temporary & put into a environment that has nothing but violence in general, then maybe have them released from prison after some time, so then reality could finally sink in for them, that's how I look at it, because people simply, "just don't get it." Now a days, young girls & boys need to act smarter & not act like idiots out in public by using physical violence to solve their problems. Though most young teenagers use "self defense" as a survival instinct, understand that at some point in your life, you WILL get caught by an authority figure or someone who has the ability to punish you, & you WILL be locked up in prison if you don't watch your surroundings, I promise you that. Young teenagers now a days think that life is a game. They can just go around, start arguments with others, & beat each others face in the ground to see who can solve an argument that would be likely forgotten the next day.
With that being said, There could probably be a few possible explanations for the rise in physical violence in today's world. First of all, the media could possibly play an important part in shaping the mindset of young teenagers. My observation tells me that the content of movies, computer games, & music that we see available in the marketplace's & stores are becoming more & more violent. I have heard of cases recently reported in the news that those young teenagers, who are addicted to computer games had displayed signs of violence. Moreover, the MTVs show's that we watch now a days on TV, or action movies that we watch, which can be quite popular amongst the teenagers, Men & Woman are also not a good influence to young people as it's content can be vulgar, immoral, & unacceptable. Another critical contributing factor which I believe lead's to a increase of physical violence is the lack of proper parental guidance & supervision. Having said that, have parents, in general, devoted so much time to their work to the extent that they have neglected their parenting responsibilities? Are parents able to set aside times after a day of hard work to communicate with their children or are they feeling so exhausted to the extent that they are unable to give the quality attention their children so desire? Are parents involved in their children’s lives? Have parents failed to discipline their children when they have done wrong? Have parents abdicated their parenting responsibilities to their maids or other family members? The list of questions for parents to reflect could go on & on, but the fact of the matter is that lack of proper parental guidance & supervision will damage the well-being of a child. The role of parents cannot be overemphasized in the lives of their children & I believe all of us would agree that children look upon their parents as their role models in life. All parents have an extremely important role to play in the spiritual, character, moral, academic, emotional, social & physical development of their sons & daughters. Hence, when parents fail to guide their children properly & when they fail to give them the attention that they need, young people would resort to seeking other places for attention in order to fulfill their sense of self-esteem even though it may involve bad company and gangs, & when a young teenagers decide to be with the wrong group of peers, it is unlikely that any good would come out of such a relationship.
Then we ask, how come some of us do not fall into such situations when it comes to physical violence? The answer is, perhaps because of the strict parenting, limited resources & no supports from outsiders. We were more obedient then when we are left to our parents control. I believe that such parenting methods are bad, but what then is good if you allow children to be influenced by peers when they starts their schooling ages. When a child is exposed into a precarious situation & tempted, one of the most basic instinct for survival in the human kind is to try, take risk, & when possible, take advantage through lying or give excuses. Such characteristics are unknown to some parents & this is how some children takes advantage of their parents. But sadly, these children are also influenced by bad characters making use of them for their pleasures. This is where all the gangs, rapes & underage sex begins. The probable answers for all these will be strict laws & enforcement, for the lack of policing & enforcement makes such buggers bolder in their activities
When I was young, my parent's always told me to use self defensive against myself, for survival if someone where to physically hit me. However, I stood against what my parent's said & I've never had to use self defense before, no matter how tempting it was, that was just not who I was back then. I was never a fighter to begin with. I'm a lover, I like to work situations out the mature way, without the punching, the slapping, the hair pulling, the choking, & all that stupid stuff. I don't like to be violent towards others. I'm a lover. I myself, have never got into ONE fight what so ever in my life with anyone, or have joined any "gangs" & so fourth, & you're probably saying right about now, "How? Not even ONE physical fight or gang?" My answer is no, because I know I am more mature then most of these "idiots" & I know how to approach something in this manner without physical violence. The mature way to handle physical violence would not be to fight back or defend yourself, for you will not survive in life if you get caught, but rather run, or walk away from that person without question, or even talk it out with that person, before violence breaks out, even if that means trying to settle agreements little by little until you come to a conclusion, or even if the conclusion means taking a break from not seeing each other, or just simply "moving on" as they say, & never seeing that person again.
With that being said, let's talk about a whole another level of physical violence:
What I can't STAND in this type of situation when it comes to physical violence, (& this just blows my mind) is when a grown Man hits a grown Woman, or a pregnant Woman with force, to brutally hurt them or permanently damage their well-being. That's the kind of physical violence that makes my blood want to BOIL & turns my stomach & makes me want to VOMIT at the same time. Most Men make situations turn 10 times worse over nothing. What are Men thinking these days, hitting Woman with force & abusing Woman over stupid & silly things in life, that will most likely be forgotten come the next day? If you've ever seen "The Steve Wilkos show" then you can relate to this. Most episodes you see on there start off with the Woman explaining: "Well, one day my husband/boyfriend abused me, hit me, molested me, raped me, attacked me, punched me, threatened me, burned me to death," & so fourth. I will never understand, what makes Men want to do this kind of stuff to Woman? Why do Men feel the need that it's okay to hit a Woman or attack a Woman using their hands or an object? Why are Men such controlling of Woman, even when in a relationship or married? How can a Man, one day say they love their girlfriend or wife, then the next day just become the complete opposite? Why do some Men treat their Woman like crap? I guess some Men just don't know how lucky they are to have a girlfriend or wife who took their own time out in their own life, at some point in their lives, to get to know everything about their man, & commit to them & love them with all their heart, & to want to start a life with them, just so she could live happy & feel comfortable & secure with their man.
Let me tell all you Men something, just because the Man is normally twice the strength & size of a Woman, does NOT give the Man ANY right to threaten a Woman or "hit" or "abuse" a Woman & then have the power to start treating her like she's nothing. Please, I know I sure as hell have absolutely NO reason to hit or touch a girl or Woman in a sexual or abusive manner, with ANY force, no matter what size she may be, big or small, nor would I EVER want to abusive or hit a Woman or ANY woman the way I see other Men beating & abusing the hell out of their Woman, for as long as I live. I would never treat any girls OR Woman like they're nothing, even if they were a stranger to me, because Woman have feelings just like us Men do. Most Men need to realize that Woman are human beings as well, & they have feelings like us Men as well. When I find that right Woman in my life, she will know that I'm always by her side, & that I would never hit or abuse her or punch her, or molest her, or rape her or anything, no matter how mad or angry or upset I get, it just won't happen because that's just NOT the kind of person I am. I am a lover & not a fighter, & I was simply born & raised this way. The way I see it, If Men were smart about their natural instincts, when faced in stressful situations, then those Men would leave the relationship or get a divorce if the Man can't handle stress & have temper problems, & know that they will take their anger out on a Woman. A real man thinks before he acts, & tries to better himself, therefore he can become a better Man.
In the end, once a Man hit's a Woman, the Man can no longer take back his actions or damage that he has done to their Woman. In the end, the Woman is the one who will suffer & will have to heal her own self as well, after all the damage the Man has done to her in her life. I say most men who hit Woman to the point where they become permanently injured in a bad way or permanently bruised or scarred for life should earn a LIFETIME sentence in jail for their stupid actions. An eye for an eye, if a Man does permanent damage to a Woman that will effect the rest of her life, then the Man should permanently stay in jail for the rest of his life, If a Man abuses his Woman without any serious injury, then the Man should also get a taste of his own medicine in jail to see what getting abused is like. If a Man beats a Woman to death, to the point were she ends up dead, then the Man should be held death penalty as well, or starved to death in jail. No Man should EVER hit a young girl OR woman, period. No "but, what, or if's." It's straight forward, just don't do it.
With that being said, the good thing is that most Woman will take appropriate action right away by telling somebody they can trust to get help, or even trying to escape away from their abuser to reach a random stranger right away who might be able to help or if they happen to reach the nearest phone & call 911, because at least these Woman are aware of their surroundings & are making efforts to better their self right away, just by doing that simple step towards making a better life for their self. Some Woman don't choose to take immediate action, because they still "depend" on their man or still have "love" for their "Man" even though they get abused & attacked on a daily basics. That's what DISGUSTS me even more is when Woman choose to stay with their husband / boyfriend even though they do this kind of stuff to them. First off, how do you stay with someone who's so controlling of you? Second, how do you even live your life being abused everyday over stupid things? Is that even possible? Why, why, WHY would you want to stay with somebody who you know is destroying your life? Day by day, week by week, month by month, year by year? In other words, WHY would you want to stay with someone who hits, attacks, punches, burns, rapes, threatens, or molests you on a daily basic's? HOW are you even alive at this point in your life? Woman deserve much more better then a scum bag who abuses her, but most Woman don't realize that. To all the Woman out there, there's nothing wrong with leaving your abuser & finding somebody else out there. I sometimes think that most Woman are scared to leave the relationship or marriage because they don't know how their "Man" will react to their decision of wanting to leave the relationship or get a divorce. For all the Woman out there, just realize that when you leave a relationship, or get a divorce, you CAN get a restraining order against your "Man," afterwards so they can never ever hit, touch, burn, molest, rape, or punch you with force physically or emotionally never hurt you ever again. Even if you still feel threatened after the breakup or divorce, just know that you have friends, family, or even strangers on your side to help you at all times, so that you're not alone in this case. Now isn't that a great feeling to have in your life?
I guess when it really comes down to everything, these are the type of Woman who are the ones who need the most help out of them all, at least to help them get out of the relationship or marriage, so they can journey on down the road to start healing their wounds & living a better life, but even in general, it's sad when one abuses another. There's no need for it. Men respect Woman, Woman respect Men, we are ALL equal in this world. Nobody has "more power" then the other. Nobody has "more or less rights" than the other in a relationship or marriage. When will people realize this? For all these young young girls & Woman out there, there are TONS of guys in this world, I'm sure ONE of them will snatch you off your feet & treat you the way you should be treated -- With respect, loyalty, honesty, commitment, & faith.
Written & published by: Kevin Beard Jr.
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